


in which ishimaru becomes subject to the mortifying experience of knowing others

by harmfulmyths



Category: Dangan Ronpa: Trigger Happy Havoc
Genre: Half-Hearted Attempts To Avoid Infodumping, Implied/Referenced Incest, M/M
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-08-05
Updated: 2019-08-05
Packaged: 2020-07-31 14:28:18
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,311
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/20116591
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/harmfulmyths/pseuds/harmfulmyths
Summary: Kuwata and Hagakure are dating. Ishimaru does his best to be supportive.





	in which ishimaru becomes subject to the mortifying experience of knowing others

**Author's Note:**

> hagakureon is the perfect ship because they would be the single most annoying couple of all time. i love it.
> 
> warnings in endnotes.

There are times Ishimaru regrets being named Class Representative.

He'd won against Naegi by virtue of one vote. Occasionally, he's overcome by the creeping feeling that Naegi ought to have won, and hadn't simply due to luck. It's a ridiculous thought, and he banishes it whenever it comes up, but it's left him with a creeping doubt that he might not be the best for the role.

Certainly, in terms of paperwork and sheer diligence, Ishimaru wins out. But Naegi naturally understands the hearts of his classmates, which, despite his studies, is an area which continues to elude Ishimaru. He simply lacks experience in friendship, which makes certain duties more difficult than they should be. And, while his new-found brotherhood with Oowada is certainly intense, it alone cannot make up over a decade of inexperience.

For example, he has absolutely no idea how to reassure his newly homosexual classmates that he is on their side, and to let him know if there's any harrassment, anything that might prevent a fulfilling school life. That it is his duty to protect them, as with any of his other classmates.

Though he wishes it were any two other classmates. He has no idea how to interact with these two.

"Hello!" he calls out, and strides into the rec room.

"Hey, my dude, Ishimaru-chi!" Hagakure says, and waves wildly, but doesn't get up from the couch to greet him. This is because Kuwata's sitting on Hagakure's lap, playing on some handheld game console. Hagakure's arm snakes around his waist.

"Hey," Kuwata says, and very carefully does not look up from his game.

Ishimaru tries not to register the disrespect. He knows far worse is to come. "So, I wanted to--"

"They spotted a Bigfoot in America!" Hagakure says, eyes gleaming. "It's really cool! All the forums are blowing up right now, it's crazy. Cause, like, we're pretty sure these pics haven't been mixed up with like, a bunch of chupacabra pics this time -- seriously, no idea how they made that mistake, they weren't that blurry--"

"I think Ishimaru wanted to say something," Kuwata says.

"Oh, okay!" And, blessedly, Hagakure shuts up.

His shoulders are already tense. Ishimaru licks his lips, and forces himself to smile at brightly as he can. "So! I just wanted to let Hope's Peak's newest couple know that--"

"Oh, me and Leo-chi aren't dating, right?" Hagakure says. He grins widely.

"Yeah," Kuwata says, without bothering to look up. He mashes the buttons on his game for a moment. "I'm taking a break from dating. Don't ask, I don't want to talk about it."

"Alright!" Ishimaru says. He's immensely confused, but relieved to hear he can go. Anything to get out of here. "If that's all, I'll just--"

Kuwata suddenly drops his game into his lap. "Okay, so, like, I dated a ton of girls in high school, but I had to keep breaking up with them because my cousin acted like a massive creep about it? Like, she stalked me when I went on dates, it was fucked up. I mean-- I love her, she's like a sister, but the way she treats me is… fucked up and unhealthy for everyone involved. And so when I get here it's, like, the first time I've ever really been able to date someone without that hanging over me, but Maizono and I didn't work out? Like, I did bad shit, she did worse shit, it just sucked."

"Um," Ishimaru says, but is promptly cut off but Kuwata raising a hand.

"Yeah, so, like, Maizono really just wanted a fuckbuddy at a time when I needed a serious relationship, so that timing was messed up. And every time she got upset I had a massive breakdown trying to comfort her because it was, like, cousin flashback hell. Also turns I have even more trauma than I thought from all that baseball garbage? Like, top that fucking mess off with her kinda freaking out when I told her I was bi and like. Urgh, that was one fucking miserable breakup. So yeah, I'm, like, taking a break from girls and just working on me for a bit."

"Because you deserve it, right!" Hagakure says. He somehow didn't stop grinning through that entire speech.

"Because I totally deserve it," Kuwata agrees. He picks his game back up and scowls. "Ugh, level timed out."

Ishimaru's head is reeling. This is more information than he has time to process.

"The Bigfoot was spotted in. Uh. In Arkansas," Hagakure says, carefully looking at Ishimaru's chest. He wraps his arms around Kuwata.

Carefully, slowly, Ishimaru breathes in through his nose until his lungs feel like they're going to burst. Then he lets the air out through his mouth, blowing cool though his lips. "That's all very lovely," he says. He doesn't know what else to say.

"No, dumbass, it sucked like hell? Were you even listening?"

"I think that was about the Bigfoot part," Hagakure says. He tugs on Kuwata's sleeve. "Hey, can I talk about the new Bigfoot sighting yet?"

"Dude, wait 'til I finish this level? I can listen better then."

Hagakure nods. "Okay!" And then, miraculously, he shuts up. Quietly, he swings one hand back and forth, like he's conducting an invisible choir. His eyes glimmer with excitement, darting around the room, but he doesn't say anything.

Ishimaru's jaw drops. He's never seen Hagakure settle down twice in a row before, and especially not for something that he finds interesting. Normal, he's just a loud, obnoxious presence who pesters whoever's around until they give in and let him ramble. "How did you make him…."

Kuwata shoots him a very ugly glare, and holds a button on the side of the console. The music gets uncomfortably loud.

"Are you certain you're not dating?"

"Nah, we're just two bros being hos," Hagakure says, beaming from ear to ear.

A tinny car crash rings out of the game's speakers. Kuwata's eyebrows knit together. "...uh, I'm pretty sure that's not a real expression?"

"Hey! If it's not real, then how could I say it?!"

Kuwata rolls his eyes all the way up. "Whatever," he grumbles, but his voice is warm. He leans into Hagakure's chest, and his body relaxes, tension dropping away.

Hagakure curls down and kisses him on the top of his head.

Kuwata tilts his head towards Ishimaru. "You should go." He switches his game off.

"I want to go hold hands behind the dumpsters again," Hagakure says.

Ishimaru stumbles away, and pinches the bridge of his nose. As soon as he can't hear their voices, he bursts into tears of stress. He finds himself moving away faster, faster, until, with a shock, he realizes that he's running in the hallways. This realization sparks a fresh set of tears, and he charges away even faster, desperate to outrun his classmates' overwhelming stupidity.

He can't stand talking to those two; it feels exactly like talking to a particularly loud and stupid brick wall, a wall that somehow reflects so much stupidity that being around it makes you feel like the stupid one instead. Perhaps Ishimaru should have gone with a mirror metaphor, but that was the kind of incredible flaw that the brick wall could pick open in a person. If brick walls could pick people open. If that was something brick walls could do.

For once, at least, he can't see how Naegi would have resolved things any better, not if they weren't actually dating.

~~~~~

Four hours later, Hagakure and Kuwata announce that they're "officially romantically together thanks to Naegi's advice, but, like, in an open way where we fuck other people? That's mostly for Hagakure's benefit, I'm not really super poly. I guess threesomes could be fun. We should do that."

That night, Ishimaru goes outside to scream and cry at the moon, which silently absorbs his pain.

**Author's Note:**

> mentions of kanon nakajima & kanon-typical content (ie, familial abuse and incest). mentions of past leosaya. some vaguely ableist stuff directed at hagakure.
> 
> ...cameo by leon's need to overshare, as per V3 bonus modes. bless V3 for #confirming that leon just walks up to random people and starts venting at them. i love these boys.


End file.
